Ambition or Control?

Are you ambitious or controlling? I know you would like to think that you are ambitious. In my constant self evaluation, I’ve been considering this concept. Often times when someone wants something for someone else it is out of love, but this should be done cautiously and sporadically. Imagine a love one always suggesting something different than what you want for yourself. Suggestions are great but they could strip one of their individuality.

This weekend I wanted to take my parents out for breakfast. I wanted to take them to a nice restaurant, but they wanted to go to Golden Coral. Can you imagine how I felt? I picked a very nice restaurant and they wanted a buffet!( I hate buffets) First I was offended, then angry. Then I realized that I could not force them to like what I like, or even try something that I thought they would like. My purpose was to take them out and show them a good time. Who cares where the good time took place. I was missing the big picture. I wanted to control the situation so much that I miss the main focus. How many times do we miss the main focus in our relationships?

My experiences suggestions from others are all good and positive until I don’t agree. If I don’t agree and they become angry that could be problematic. That is when a simple suggestion could turn into control. If the suggestion is not agreed upon and anger follows; that is control. It is human nature to want the best for the people that we love but we must allow them to have their own aspirations. It is controlling to want things for others and ambitious to want things for yourself.

Leading by example is so much more effective than just telling someone what you think they should do. If you are focused on what you should be doing, the result would be greater and you will be an inspiration. Look at the definitions of each word, ambition sounds more positive and self directed.Because the only thing we really have control over is ourselves……….

am·bi·tion

amˈbiSH(ə)n/

noun

a strong desire to do or to achieve something, typically requiring determination and hard work. Desire and determination to achieve success.

con·trol

kənˈtrōl/

noun

the power to influence or direct people’s behavior or the course of events